Unfinished Business

BUZZ!!! Your girlfriend...WOOF!

Monday, December 12, 2005


Screw Toby Maguire!

P.S. Where can I get some Chuck Norris pajamas? I really like the footie kind.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Back Again...

Today, I fixed a T.V. with nail clippers, a plastic knife and a file. To answer a question from like 3 mths. ago, I check the Bryan Singer vids daily, and the teaser trailer in high-def rocked my world. It will certainly be a SUPER summer. Oh, yeah, I'll be back at work in a week, so I should be bored enough to blog for a while. PEACE.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

My Phlog

Ok, because I'm too lazy to make a photoblog like Carter, I'm just going to straight up, one post, showcase my personal faves of the insane amount of pictures I've been taking since July. That's right, I had the hobby way before this post, and therefore, am not a copy cat. Just lazy...maybe a little tired, a little sweaty, maybe a little hungry...you get where I'm going with this. So, prepare your eyes for the five course feast they are about to be served courtesy of muah and Target, for selling me a camera I could afford.


Now the rest of these I just kind of took, like the first one, I definitely wandered aimlessly around campus for about an hour until I saw this and had to shoot it. Done.

And for those of you who doubt my patriotism because I don't always aggree with our President, I leave you with this. Don't get used to this sight though. My flag is going to look a lot different when I'm in charge, you know, maybe something red with a fanged bat...I've got some early concept art going.

Monday, October 03, 2005

"I Don't Mind Getting Shot...

...I just don't like being told about it first"-Bob Dylan

This is one of those that I didn't quite know how to start...so that was kind of an ice-breaker I guess. People really really surprise me with their stupidity. I know being an American that I should be used to this kind of thing, but I guess I'm just a little stubborn. It's not like anyone is ever going to be as smart as me anyways. Case in point, today in my history class we were discussing important dates of the revolutionary war. Much to his delight, my sniveling little professor got to the declaration of independence, which as a history professor, is one of those few opportunities to throw in some generic cliché expression, which he did. As if that wasn't bad enough, a girl in the back of the class, whom my rather astute friend Britney has observed is on her last few brain cells, raises her hand to ask what date that occurred. My professor laughed, assuming she was joking, but she wasn't. You heard it. She did not know the date that is celebrated as the birth of our nation, July 4th, 1776. In accordance with her previous display of ignorant bliss, she paused, looked around, and exclaimed "oh, I get it now. That’s why it's called independence day." I wanted to hurt myself.

Me severing my own head with a lightsaber.

It's ok though, because the day really didn't get better. W once again confirmed that if you had ever come across his path in any way, shape, or form that you could and would get appointed to a high government position, regardless of your experience level or qualifications. Good to know. This is also part of that American stupidity thing. Or at least 51 percent of America. Moving on, I can't stand the new Jack Link's Beef Jerky commercials. They're about as funny to me as a toilet seat with piss on it.

A toilet seat with piss on it.

I watch a lot of tv, and I demand that my eyes no longer be subjected to that kind of torture. That's it, I'm out. I leave you with Superman beating the balls out of Batman.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Update Time!

All right, here's the deal. It has been an incredibly crazy month around here. First of all, they want us to go to class here at Tech. Now what the freak is that about?!?! I'm not sure, but I do know it pisses me off. Second, me + drunk people that used to be cool= me going ballistic. If you really want to know, ask me about it. I can handle the drinking; even in excess...it's the behavior that goes with it that really just blows my mind. Good. Now, Tech football has been rocking my nuts off as of late. So far we're 4-0, with a pretty solid win in our first Big 12 game. My props go out to T.H. for being awesome and to Hodges for getting back up even though our offensive line, or rather lack their of, is terrible. Moving on, I shaved my head. I don't know why, but I did. It feels awesome. So as for everything else...I found a church, I still hate Spanish, Smallville season 5 is geared up and rocking my world, I started working out and gave up already...for now, and I still hate Spanish and most of the faculty in that department. Solid. I give you...my month in pictures. There's like four of em...and the first ones are older, but I was definitely playing with a lightsaber in the dark and that rules.

Yes, I am a Jedi for hire.

Wreck 'Em!

I thought the tennis shirt really complimented the country music atmosphere.

A nice one with the lady...also makes a good contrast for...


So, yeah, I'll try and do this again sometime.

Thursday, August 25, 2005


Ok, to all three of you who occasionally stop by and read this garbage, I sincerely apologize for the brief hiatus in my posting. I had a really busy week getting my things together so I could move back to Lubbock (the LBK) for school, and let me tell you, I had a lot of fun while doing it. I got to spend some time with good friends and even my family for a little bit. So here I am. The posts should flow like wine now that I'm at Tech, because, well, there’s a lot of a funny drunk person around all the time. No longer will I be leaving my room without a camera. No, it will be awesome. So...

Wreck 'EM!

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

...And Now, The Conclusion!

Ok, so I've spent the past few days in a trance-like state, doing my best to give an accurate play by play of how the fight between Mr. T and MacGyver would go down. After several hours of thought and prayer, I think I've got it. Also, since I am the self-proclaimed master of all that is trivial, any suggestion that the fight would differ in any way from the account listed here will be ridiculed and furthermore ignored by the author, so step off B. Here it goes. One day Mr. T. is making his daily rounds in his 1983 GMC Custom Van when he come across some kids vandalizing a youth center. Hold on a sec, and behold the glory of Mr. T's sweet van. Right, on with it then. So as Mr. T emerges to beat the children to a bloody pulp, he fails to realize they're not children at all, they're construction workers, and they're actually building a youth center, not destroying one. To add to the confusion, he also believes the white paint they're using on the walls is some form of poisoned milk meant to harm the children. Things are not looking good for the workers who have all wet their pants by this point in anticipation of the vicious unwarranted beating that awaits them. Little did any of them know that high above the clouds, in a hang glider constructed entirely out of pixie stick tubes and hot-glued pine needles, MacGyver is patrolling the skies. Seeing everything that's happening below, Mac takes action and begins his descent upon the construction site. While the sight of the flying man distracts T, the workers escape, which further incites him to rage. In this moment of weakness, MacGyver, wielding a lasso he made out of dead skin cells and wolverine fur, disarms T of his large machine gun (Mac hates guns!). It is so on. Before Mac hits the ground, T throws a minute boulder (see below) at him, thoroughly disabling his glider and plummeting both to the ground.

A Minute Boulder

As Mac comes to, he wakes to the blurred image of a large fist reigning blow after blow upon his face. This simply would not do. Mac uses his feet to throw T off and escapes into the woods. T tries to follow in his van, but Mac hides in a hollow tree trunk to avoid detection. Mac considers his options. He could either make a rail gun out of an old hair dryer, part of a tape player, and his top right molar, or a small cold fusion device out of a bag of cheetos puffs.

Revel In The Awesome Power!

As Mac plots and plans his attack, Mr. T does what he does best. He drinks some milk and gets really pissed. So pissed in fact, he begins up-rooting the trees of the forest one by one and throwing them obscene distances. Mac's cover is prematurely blown and he is once again forced into open combat. Mr. T, who obviously has the physical upper hand, wails unmercifully on MacGyver. Right as he's about to lose consciousness, Mac notices a rare ivy growth, that if mixed with methane, could cause certain elements, such as gold, to superheat. Mac grabs some of the leaves, stuffs them in T's front pocket, rolls on his stomach and thanks god Taco Bell was the only thing open the night before. As his flagellant fills the air, the gold chains around Mr. T's neck begin to heat up, eventually melting though his neck and decapitating him. Mac stumbles away, combing through his mullet, grateful that his superior intellect had saved him yet again when all the sudden...
Yeah, you guessed it. Mac and Mr. T were definitely fighting in the same forest that Arnold and the Predator were throwin' down in, so when that wanker Predator decided to self destruct, Mac and T are both incinerated in the blast.What a wanker!

You may be asking yourself then, who won the fight? Was it Mac because T. died first, or did the explosion nullify the entire battle? Well my friends, the answer is simple. It doesn't matter. The point of all this is that Dutch from the Predator would kick both their collective backsides! Arnold Rules!"Rest in peace you ugly mother f---ers!"